Not my finest hour....

Let me start off by saying that I am very proud of my daughter, her heritage and how she joined our family. I think adoption rocks and I'm very open about it. However, I do get annoyed when we are out and about, doing normal family things, and strange(rs) feel the need to quiz us on our family planning choices.

You'd think that I'd be used to it by now, but seriously, the older Allie gets, the less I appreciate the questions. Not only because we are just going about our life, I don't want our daughter to feel like a spectacle or accessory without the right for privacy. Just because our family came together in an nontraditional way, we are just an average family and I really don't feel the need to be an open book. All. The. Time. When my daughter isn't around and adoption comes up, I'm all about it - very open to questions and willing to share my views on adoption and how it's an awesome way to build a family. The only details I avoid are about Allison's abandonment, since they are for her to divulge, if she ever chooses to do so.

So, whenever we are approached and asked (although we're never asked) to play the adoption, why China 20 questions game, I always try to remain gracious and polite, mainly for my daughters sake. But, that doesn't mean that I'm not thinking about what I'd really like to say about their lack of social graces.

Usually the conversation starts goes like this:
Strange(r): staring at the white woman (me) with Asian child (Allie)
Me: avoiding eye contact or just blow off with brief smile
Strange(r): "Your baby is cute" ignoring my 'cute' son if he's there (but, that's not what the conversation is really about)
Me: "Thank you"
Strange(r): "How old is she?"
Me: "Two" or "Two, and my son is seven" (if Brent is with us) I'm feeling it....here it comes...
Strange(r): "Where is she from?"
Me: "China" or lately, Allison sometime responds "China baby, yeahhhhh!"
Strange(r): either ends conversation, or continues with their story of folks they know who have adopted, or asks intrusive questions - often questioning why I didn't adopt from the US.
Me: try to act like an air-headed-distracted mom who has to run (although it's not a far stretch), all the while keeping a friendly tone and smile plastered on my face.

Rewind to last week, a review of my finest hour (NOT):
location: grocery store - with Allie in the cart (Brent's in school)
Strange(r): doing the stare
Me: not taking the bait, avoiding eye contact. I have PMS and Allison is squirmy in the cart - closing in on naptime. I'm trying to make it to the checkout before the meltdown.
Strange(r): pushes her cart next to me and says "Where's she from?"
Me: thinking 'Huh, no segway? Humor me please.' My PMS-y reply "our hometown"
Strange(r): "What country?"
Me: still PMSing "Why do you ask?"
Strange(r): "Oh, I have a grown daughter from Korea and two beautiful new grandchildren from Korea."
Me: Gulp! Looking for exit or hole to climb into. From there I did a real bang-up job trying to back pedal out of my ignorant comment. Good God, the only time I've ever been flip, is to another a-parent AND grandparent. Could I have felt like a bigger ass? Let me answer that - NOPE.

Note to self: even if PMSing - BE NICE!